A word on motivation.

My friend Mary is the queen of motivating others. She has a kind of intuitive sense of what people need to hear to accomplish a goal.

When I was working toward my higher degrees, Mary kept telling me that no matter what, I could do it. I really needed to hear that. I was struggling in so many ways. When I achieved my goal, she attended my graduation as an honored guest. I could not have appreciated her more if she had done the work for me.

Flash forward two months, when I seated my nine-year-old son next to Mary during lunch. He has been having some problems with getting his reading done for school and we talked about it. She asked him what he needed to achieve in March, and it's a lot. He told her which book it was and said he needs to finish it by May 28 to test on it and get the points. When he told her it was nearly 500 pages, she shook her head and said to me, over his head, "Oh no. There's no way he can finish that book in time."

My son's eyes blazed. He was absolutely furious. He turned bright red and slid all the way down in his chair.

I whispered to him, "What's the matter?"

Almost in a growl, he said, "I don't LIKE IT when someone tells me I can't do something."

I responded, "Well, then I guess you have to show her you CAN do it."

Since then, the kid has read every night at least an hour. He knows he can do it, so he can.

Anger can be a powerful motivator. And sometimes, it takes others to show you how to make it work for you.